I need to update this things more often.... Anyways, this semester is continuing to be a tremendous pain in the ass, and I'm never exact;y sure how I'm standing...... I'm ready for school to be out, so that I can just have the nights to myself to do what I want. Anyways, I'm headinfg off to bed, I hvae an exam tomorrow. Such is the story that has become my life... Goddnight All
Quote of the night goes to Jason: who after falling on the floor for a second time drunk off his ass and laughing looks to me and says "Hey man, turn off the TV, there blue words on it that say something egypt and they're bothiering me............." Directly following thatJason head-butted the floor and gave himself a nosebleed.
Wow..... Let's see what been going on in my mind. I've had quite a few issues in the past week or so. First of all, I'm getting really tired of people complaining to me about stuff that they make no attempt to fix. To me it is very frustrating. I've actually felt really underappreciated and taken for granted by people recently as well. I mean, I'm giving much more of myself to people than they probably can understand, not beacuse I'm trying to get anything in return, but beacuse I geniunely want everyone to be happy. But then people go and do things, or say things, that just make me want to go off of the depp end and go shoot up a few road signs or something I don't really want my time I spend with these peole to devovle into a who is more pitiful match though. I mean, frankly when it comes to most people, I know that I will win hands down. That's not the point though, I'm just tired of being overlooked by people, recnetly I've felt like I'm lost in a big sea of people, and I have to keep jumping up and down to get other people's attention. I don't like feeling that way, it's very disheartening. Since, I'm writing this to noone in particular, I guess I can feel al little sorry for myself. I've been having these horrible headaches again, as a matter of fact, I have one right now. The doctor's have absolutely no idea what causes them, and therefore no idea as to how to treat them. So I've jsut kind of been playing through the pain. However, as a result of being so lonely recently, I've found myself, polaying through the pain a lot more recently. I've had a busy time this past week, and it has been hard to find time that I can just be myself and not have to worry about other people. I've had spo much on my mind recently, it's hard to deal with certain people. some people in my life, think that I am a very different person than who I actually am. Not many, but much more than you'd think. It's not that I totally change my personality, it's jsut that I'm more subued, or less confrontational, or etc etc etc...... Anyways, Othat's all kinda started to drag on me recently, and I just want to tell certain people to leave me alone, because I have more important things that I need to attend to. Anyways, It is bedtime for me. I hop ethat everyone has a good night, and enjoyed reading my little rant. G'night all
And The Song Of The Moment
When I pretend everything is what I want it to be
I look exactly like what you had always wanted to see
When I pretend to forget about the criminal I am
Stealing second after second just 'cause I know I can
But I can't pretend this is the way it'll stay
I'm just trying to bend the truth
I can't pretend I'm who you want me to be
So I'm lying my way from you
No, no turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Anywhere on my own
'Cause I can see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
Is me
I remember what they taught to me
Remember condescending talk of who I ought to be
Remember listening to all of that and this again
So I pretended up a person who was fitting in
And now you think this person really is me and
Trying to bend the truth
The more I push the more I'm pulling away
'Cause I'm
Lying my way from you
No, no turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Anywhere on my own
'Cause I can see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
The very worst part of you
Is me
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
This isn't what I want it to be
I never thought that what I said
Would have you running from me
Like this
You
No turning back now
I want to be pushed aside
So let me go
No, no turning back now
Let me take back my life
I'd rather be all alone
No turning back now
Than anywhere on my own
'Cause I can't see
No, no turning back now
The very worst part of you
The very worst part of you
Is me
Sooooooo, let's see what's been going on... I went to Williamsburg, which was good. It was definetl nice to get a real chance to relax about things. Although I'm not necesarrily very physically relaxed, (actually I'm in tremendous pain) my mind is at eaSe at the moment. For a few brief moments I've been able to just sit back and think about all that life is at the moment. I've got plenty of reasons to be happy. I have a beuaitful girlfriend, aI'm learning a job skill that will help me not only do something I enjoy but also make a lot of money at, and all in all I just feel very comfortable with my life. It's the first itme that I've felt like this in a very long time. I really like it...... Granted I'm sure that once school starts back up the feeling will probably fade into the background, as school starts to weigh more and more on my mind, but I'm just happy, and it's a very freeing feeling. Now, if someone could just figure out how to make the pain go away everything would be perfect...